Sunday Scribbling … #144 for richer or poorer

January 4, 2009 § 5 Comments

Tony was one of the fabulously wealthy kids at college where we were all WASPS, safe, comfortable,children of the gentrified.

Tony was other worldly rich, like a trumped-up television character, where everything  becomes flat and non-dimensional simply because it’s assumed and available.

He was cute, a bit pixie-ish, with dark hair that flopped in his face, a certain energy, and messy expensive clothes. He always wore an engaging smile but it burned out and became more of a pinch once he got high. Which he did often.   We would see the color drain from his face and the blue go out of  his eyes as he faded. His grip when we reached out to help him became weaker and weaker.

You wonder how Elvis and Janis and Jimmy  and John Belushi and Kurt all got away from us. You wonder why no one stopped them or saved them. But you just cannot always find the dark places they go to in order to hide from everyone, and so they become … unstoppable.

Tony’s dad couldn’t buy his son back once Tonyducked  into that final dark place. 
What’s almost worse was to have loved Tony.

written for sunday scribblings ….


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§ 5 Responses to Sunday Scribbling … #144 for richer or poorer

  • floreta says:

    this is a nice slice of life. i’m not sure about the ending though. it almost seems unfinished. but it definitely shows the pain of having loved someone that slips.. nice job.

  • anno says:

    I sense an incomplete story here as well, but one that resonated deep in the bone. You’ve definitely snagged this reader’s sympathies. Welcome to Sunday Scribblings!

  • Linda Jacobs says:

    This is a heartbreaking prose poem! I like the ending. It leaves the reader with questions but also some answers, too!

  • I think this is excellent, just the right amount of information for the reader and the uncertainty at the end leaves the reader thinking which is definitely a good thing. Beautifully written too

  • oh says:

    Floreta – You’re right; it’s pretty much unfinished. I took the “scribblings” literally when I wrote this, a bit of an experiment. I even got nervous as I posted the piece. I’ll take more time with it next week!

    Anno – Thanks for the “welcome” (see above note to floreta about the unfinished aspect.) Yes, I will work on the next one, if the subject resonates. Honestly, I had a hard time with this topic. I dunno why. Vacay frame of mind?

    Linda – So glad you stopped by! Yes, there are a lot of unaswered questions. I think fiction is veeeery difficult. Will continue to work at it.

    Thanks, Crafty! Glad it worked for you. I have been looking at it, wonderfing if it could really “be” somehting, but had better get going on the piece I am supposed to be writing!

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